Hi Mom!!
I have very mixed feelings today.  :D

First, is guilt. This is a good emotion, in my book, because the first step to repentance is "feel sorrow for what you have done." I was feeling a little prideful after last week with all the success that was happening in this new area that I almost forgot to give praise where it was due, to our Father in Heaven. Now we both know that complete pig-headedness isn't really in my nature. I'm my worst critic. But I was certainly trying to take credit for some successes that never could be mine. I appreciated the email you forwarded between you and Lisa because that reminded me just how much our lives really are in the Lord's hands.

Second is gratitude. I always knew I was lucky to have parents who were determined to stick out their marriage/family no matter what but I never knew just how great of a blessing that was in my life. I am able to have greater hope for my own future as well as the future of our family because of yours and Dad's great example. How blessed we are as a family because you and Dad decided from the beginning to base our upbringing on the eternal principles of the gospel of Jesus Christ! I may not be perfect (contrary to Dad's belief. ;) ) but I am closer to it than I could have been should I have been raised on the precepts of men.

Third is absolute love for...I hesitate to admit...make sure you and Dad are sitting down...rice! Since Sister Phonsina is from Laos and she likes to cook a lot, we have been eating rice almost every day since I got here. And it's good! I think I might even save my monies and buy a rice cooker! Wow!!

I love the work I have been called to do here. This week was a rougher week because of a rather tearful Sister Activity and hearing Sister Mesake bear her testimony to us sisters for the last time. I am really going to miss her.

Then this was just one of those weeks where everyone was either not home or not interested. Cancelled appointments left and right really have an effect on the day. But it doesn't get us down. Just makes me want to work harder so we don't have those weeks anymore. The more people we have to teach, the less time we spend knocking on doors of empty houses.

I have been laboring to decided what attribute I want to develop this transfer and I think I got it. Understanding. I want to develop an understanding of why people are the way they are and why they make the decisions they make. A lot of that will come through increased sensitivity to the Spirit, who knows the hearts and intents of all my brothers and sisters.

The scripture of the week comes from Alma 26:37. Our Heavenly Father is mindful of all people. He knows us individually and uniquely. His hand of mercy is extended so that we may have that fullness of joy He experiences all the time. How great a gift that is! Through our Savior, we can be cleansed from sin. What a promise! I cannot begin to describe the peace that brings not only to me for my life, but also for the lives of those I have become so heavily involved with. Not everyone accepts the gospel. "Many are called, but few are chosen. And why are they not chosen?" But many are still called. Everyone still needs that call.

Love,
Sister Shavonne Fielding